Healing Fibromyalgia: From Pain to Play with Kore Curry

On today's episode, we get real with Kore Curry about pain, fibromyalgia, and healing childhood trauma.

Kore’s Bio

Kore Curry is a proud graduate from Cleveland State University with a Masters in Occupational Therapy. She has six years of experience as an OT, specializing in the elderly population. Born in Pittsburgh PA, she has lived most of her life in Cleveland, Ohio. After several years of severe pain with no real answers, she was finally diagnosed with fibromyalgia in April of 2019. Kore loves spending time with her husband Ajax and partner Kitsu. She wants to become a yoga instructor so she can continue to help others heal in various ways.

Full Transcript

Ep 7 - Kore Curry

Sarah Marshall, ND: Welcome to heal. 

On today's episode, we get real with Kore Curry about pain, fibromyalgia, and healing childhood trauma. I'm your host, Dr. Sarah Marshall.

Kore, thank you so much for being here and being willing to just talk about what you've dealt with and share your story of fibromyalgia is a flippin' big deal. And there was a lot of people that get diagnosed or not diagnosed with fibromyalgia in the 90’s and in the early 2000’s and it was really kind of looked down upon like a, not a real thing and you Thank God transformed that and it's actually like got documented research and credibility. But I think part of the struggle conventional medicine has is when they don't really know how to treat something, they don't really bother to diagnose it or they, or they don't have as much knowledge around it.

And so that's why I've done a lot of work with people with fibromyalgia and how you and I got connected. But, um, just thanks for being willing to share what your experience of it's been and like where you kind of see where it came from and what you've been doing about it. Cause it's rare to have someone, I will tow your to your horn, which is the amount of healing you've done in not yet even a year, is like really remarkable. I have rarely seen anybody with either fibro or chronic fatigue or, um, the other very closely related as Sears chronic inflammatory response syndrome. That genre of diseases and disorders, you're, you're in the lead for how fast you've moved through some major stuff. So I think you're in a good position to talk about, how the hell did you do it and what did it take? 

Kore Curry: Well, thank you. I do want to start off finding the right doctor to believe in you and understand that you're not just in your head was the trickiest of all. Cause my first doctor, he would just prescribe medicine and say, try that and it was difficult to just be like, no, this is only temporary fixing it. And then within a week or two later, I'm experiencing those symptoms again because it wasn't actually treating the symptoms, it was treating the symptoms but not the disorder. And that was beyond frustrating. So back in April of last year, when I found a doctor that finally believed me and had references to what fibromyalgia is, was finally a relief, even though she was still treating the symptoms, at least gave me the doorway to find out how to get rid of treating the symptoms and actually attacking the diagnosis. Um, that was very frustrating up to that point, cause I would just have periods of brain fog, not being myself, not being able to work, tired all the time and the pain, just it's crippling. It feels like you're under a steam roller and keep getting rolled over. It can't seem to escape. Tylenol doesn't do it. Percocet. Darvocet none of that would work. It would take the edge off, maybe me, but it didn't really truly alleviate to function. And then not only that, you get the like the drugs like Cymbalta and Gabapentin that I think actually make your symptoms worse in the long run. Cause you keep increasing the doses. And yes, it temporarily relieves them, but then you have to increase it again, and then these meds make you have brain fog, tired all the time, not being able to focus. And I'm like, where's the win in it? 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. Yeah. And then, then you're getting effects from the drugs that are so similar to the original disorder. Like you can't really tell where one ends and the other one begins. Yeah. So when did you first get diagnosed, or maybe even when did you first suspect there was something going on? 

Kore Curry: Well, I think I suspected in 2018 around, between September and November. I can't really, cause it's a blur, quite honestly. I lost like two, three years of my life to this fibromyalgia where I don't remember a lot of things. It all blurs together and it's, it truly is brain fog. Like I, my, uh, mates actually pointed out things that I forgotten in the two years, two to three years that I, you know, I would come home and crash out on the couch.

I don't remember that. All I remember is going to work and just trying to go to different doctors. I don't remember having like a year of just not being able to function. So I think that's when I suspected it. It doesn't help that I ever, I'm an occupational therapist that I go ahead and diagnose myself because I know better, right? But then April of last year, so April, 2019. I finally decided to go with a new doctor because I was getting fed up with just being put on prescriptions and not actually getting results. So I found that the new doctor, and she goes, well, let's try a bunch of different tests. Surprise here’smore tests, and then she put me on different meds, which seemed to alleviate the symptoms. But she had to keep increasing them every week or two. And she knew someone who deals with fibromyalgia. She goes, you know what? I think you definitely have it. So in may of 2019 I went to the fibro doctor and he said he could tell from setting his first eyes on me with the sunken eyes, the paleness, the kind of a ghost look to me that he knew right away that I was fibromyalgia. So that's when I was able to finally get answers and comfort knowing that I finally have a diagnosis. Okay, now let's see what we can do to improve it. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: So you'd have been a couple years and then like when you look back over your life, when does it seem like you actually started having symptoms or feeling sick?

Kore Curry: Probably back in 2009-2010 when it really started to level me. 

Sarah Marshall, ND:  and what were the first things that you dealt with?

Kore Curry: stomach issues actually were my first things. I would constantly go to the doctor's going, Hey, my stomach is severely nauseated. I can't keep food down. I can't eat these different foods. I would go through spells of diarrhea and constipation and they go, well, it's irritable bowel syndrome.

You know, I even had a colonoscopy and endoscopy done. And they're like, you look perfectly healthy, nothing's wrong. And then they told me, it's stress. Just do yoga. Well, if you're hurting so bad, how are you supposed to do these things? And so I went through the struggle of trying to find different doctors to deal with my intestinal issues. And then when I finally started going on different tracks of eating different foods and nothing seemed to really help, quite honestly, but I didn't, I didn't have the right resources either. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: But with what you had, you were trying it out. Yeah, 

Kore Curry: and I've always had headaches since I can remember, literally, I don't know how far back, probably when I was 11 or 12 when they first started, so I don't know if that was related to that or not. But then the headaches kept getting worse. And then I had neck symptoms, and then in 2017 I ended up in the hospital for six days with an intestinal infection. And at that point, I was like, okay, something's gotta be done. So I do have to say diet does work with it because when I went on the Keto diet, I started feeling better, but then the pain came back. So the stress of my life, living at my parents' house and dealing with walking on eggshells all the time, the keto diet only works so much, drinking water only works so much. I didn't realize how much stress does affect fibromyalgia, and it kept spiraling out of control. I had neck pain, had to miss work for neck pain, and then it just kind of crippled my body between 2017 through 2019, to the point where I literally was calling off of work too much and getting in trouble for it. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. Yeah. You know, and it's one of those things, it's like, when you're actually living inside of it, it's this huge, there's this huge impact, but especially when it grows slowly. I mean, you can tell me how it was for you, but it's like, it almost can be like, you can't totally tell how bad it's gotten when it happens so slowly over time it becomes your new normal. And even though it's like, okay, I know this really isn't good, but maybe I'm just tired. Maybe this is just normal. I've even heard people bless their little 30 year old hearts, tell me, you know, well, I just know it might be age. I'm like, you're a 30 it's not age yet. We got a while. Right? But we start to come up with these things to just sort of say: I don't know, maybe it's just me, it's not that big a deal, maybe it's in my head, like, did you deal with some of that stuff along those lines? 

Kore Curry: Oh yeah. Like, um, I can even go back farther to previous to 2009 actually, in, when I first started college in 2004, I was tired all the time. Now that I'm remembering. And mom would say, well, you're just burning your candle at both ends and blah, blah, blah. No, I'm not. I'm literally going to school during the week, coming home and sleeping, and on the weekends I go out once or twice that that's should be normal for 20 some year old to do. And I was just constantly tired and could not fight through it, and I lost reality. When I was tired all the time, I could not focus. I didn't realize what was going on. I did start thinking there was something wrong with me, but I wasn't getting answers.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yup. So then here we are, fast track. You go to the fibromyalgia doctor and you actually finally have some people that are like, yup, this is real. Yup. There's things to do about it. What was that like when you first had those conversations?

Kore Curry: There was a mixed reaction. I was relieved to know that it wasn't just in my head. I'm not making this up. At the same time, I was kind of devastated cause I know the prognosis of fibromyalgia and doctors say that it's something you're going to have to deal with for the rest of your life. Here's what we can do for you to treat the symptoms back to treating the symptoms. So it was kind of a mix. Oh, thank God I have an answer, but great, how am I going to cope with this? And one thing I do want to point out is the fibro doctor actually said that I was on my way to a nursing home with how severe my symptoms were, and that actually knocked me off my rails. Like, working in a nursing homeI know what that's like. And you said that he treated a 20 year old that was in a nursing home due to fibromyalgia, and his protocol helped her get her life back. So at that time it was, Oh God, thank you, there's some hope in my future. I didn't realize how much it would actually mean to me, but, um, at the time it was, it was depression, it was sadness, it was happiness and yet there was some sort of calm that came over me. But I knew I had a fight ahead of me and I didn't know how bad that fight still would have been at that time. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yup. So then what happened? 

Kore Curry: Well, I started going to that fibro doctor for two months. Two to three maybe. But the problem with Fibromyalgia with a lot of patients is that they don't discover it until they're much older. So the doctor wasn't really conducive to my schedule. You know, he worked Monday through Friday, but Monday through Thursday was eight to four and if you didn't make an appointment on time, you had reschedule, even though if you call and you're on your way, you still had to make me reschedule. And on Fridays it was only new patients and Fridays was my day off. And then I had to go in and actually get the per the meds that he prescribed, the homeopathic rep regimen that he prescribed, and I had to pick it up right there. Instead of the mail order. And it was frustrating. So then I became real frustrating, well, this isn't conducive, but I want to keep going. So then I decided to check out you. You seem more adaptable at the time, and my perception was, well, you're more adaptable, you know what's already going on, you've seen me spiral and you were pretty much, you understood the UNDA’s he put me on and you had the knowledge base, so I was like, okay, well maybe that this is the route to go... 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Right? Yeah. And for awhile there we were going to do work. You know, concurrently together. And then there was just some logistical things that, and that is one of the challenges when, you know, a lot of people are dealing with a chronic illness and the very things they need to do to get the chronic illness better are hard to do because they have the chronic illness or, you know, scheduling work, schedule, all those kinds of things. Kind of run into it too. So it's making your life work around the whole thing. 

Kore Curry: Yeah. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. So how was it? Cause like you kind of dove in the deep end of the pool when it came to protocols and you know, like, and I want you to share a little bit about like literally what you do, like every day. Like you get up and then you do this and then you do that. Cause I, you know. You have taken it on in such a way, it's made a huge difference really quickly, and I know that the, there's no small, it was no small effort that got you there. 

Kore Curry: Well, let me jump back to the first fibro doctor...

Sarah Marshall, ND: Sure. 

Kore Curry: He gave me the four things of drops I had to do a day, and then I had, and I do that three times a day, and I had all these supplements like, three or four supplements at the time to do two to three times a day. I was overwhelmed and I'm like, freaking out. I'm not going to get on top of this. I don't know how to do this. I don't have time in the morning. My work gives me a half an hour lunch. Where am I going to do it? At work?I was freaking out. To be honest, It is very overwhelming to get the, the, the UNDA’s in and all the supplements in but then you work out a routine. I'll tell you what, within the first week of taking the UNDA’s, I realized it was worth it because they started feeling relief. I started taking the medications less, and I started being able to function better and come out of that fog a little bit. So in the long run, yes, at first it was overwhelming, but it was rewarding. So then when I got to your protocol and there was that, um, double or triple the amount that hit me it wasn't as overwhelming because I realize it did work. It was a little bit at first, but then like trying to get the schedule in again and trying to get, because you have different set of times you had like almost. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: There are six times a day written on there. Yeah, exactly.

Kore Curry: it was only three times before, but if I hadn't had that leading up to that..

Sarah Marshall, ND: and I don't start everybody where we started, you know, there was some unique circumstances, including, you already were familiar with some things, and I even asked you, I was like. How do you want to take this on and you're like, just hit me, we’ll work it out, you know?

Kore Curry: When I got into a routine again, I started feeling relief. I started seeing differences and it kept me going. Yeah. Um, quite honestly, I don't feel it's overwhelming to take all that stuff if I know it's working. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. Yeah… if you have that, that connection to it...

Kore Curry: even if it isn't and I'm going through a down dip and it's not working, I usually am able to be like, well, if you don't do it, you're going to start to go backwards, so you should continue doing that. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Totally. And you know, this podcast isn't going to include like a whole explanation of the protocol and what we did and why we did it. And when I say protocol, it's like, there's a certain set of homeopathic remedies, herbal remedies, nutraceutical supplements, and regular just daily, like support vitamins and minerals, but they are customized to you specifically, not even just fibro, it's not like I have a paint by numbers chart that we take everybody through and I think that's..  In natural medicine or you know, Chinese medicine has it and in many forms of chiropractic has it. That's really critical is that we're not even treating fibro. We're not treating the disease. It was you and what you needed and where you were at and and unwinding your body in that process.

Like, how do we turn things on that haven't been working? And how do we actually get your body to be able to detoxify? Cause in fibromyalgia toxicity is a huge component. Emotional and physical and so as we've been working those layers off, you know, and then building your energy up enough. So that when we do detoxify you, we don't level you, you know, as if it's this, it's like it's a dance. It's this whole coordination, the stance of the process over the last, I guess now you started doing this with your first fibro doctor in about April? 

Kore Curry: May… 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Okay. Yeah.The UNDA’s are a form of homeopathic remedy specifically. So just to kind of get everyone included clued in on it, so when we kind of, we have, yeah, go ahead.

Kore Curry: I add to that though, when I had switched over to you, I felt a sense of relief with your protocol versus his, his protocol was the same set of UNDA’s for… he had me up to four months. And then you had explained the purpose of UNDA’s and said that it, it's better to switch them up. So it was more reassuring. And I do have to say, when he did the trial run of taking me off on the UNDA’s for a week, 

Sarah Marshall, ND: yeah, 

Kore Curry: let's just say I was on the millennium force crashing to the floor, 

Sarah Marshall, ND: and that was his context, was to just actually see like how are they working and what are they doing and what they're doing. And so they were working really well and then took them away and yeah.

Kore Curry: Yeah. It's. You want to put it in your quotes or whatever. You all are looking for a secret medicine or pill… UNDA’s! 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yes. I love that you say that. I, I know there are clients of mine out there right now listening to this, that, um, you know, I, I to each their own and they do work with different bodies in different ways.

You have a particular, I actually think that this is correlates, like, you know, we get into like, well, why did you have fibro in the first place? Right? And I assert, I don't have like research to back this up, but that fibromyalgia heavily correlates to children who've grown up in traumatic homes and then the other thing that happens when you grow up in a traumatic home, either there's mental illness or there is addiction or whatever the circumstances are.

As a kid to survive, you have to enhance your intuition and your sensitivity. Like you had to be sensitive to like, how's my mom going to be today? What, what version am I going to get? And what happens in that case is, is there's this energetic and emotional sensitivity that gets developed, which in the long run is a great strength. You have this compassion and this empathy and the sensitivity to your patients, the people that you work with and also in your life. But it's also a detriment where like any little thing gets in and impacts you. And I think there's a emotional and physical like mirroring of each other. And that physically you also were sensitive. So one, your body takes in toxicity, it impacts you more. You hold onto it tighter and two, though, I also see correlatively, when I have patients like that or clients like that, that I then put on UNDA’s, homeopathic remedies, the more energetic remedies, they're equally as sensitive to the remedies. There's this whole theme through the whole thing. Cause you know, I've treated hundreds of people and not everybody responds the same way with the same experience of either relief that quickly or any of that. Right. So it's always fascinating to me, like all of the differences. But in your case in particular, we put them in you and you were like, Oh, that’s so much better.

Kore Curry: And I will add to that too, like, um, what the emotional thing, it took me for the longest time to do the correlation, but when I would have an emotional response to what was going out on, on the outside world, I would notice my immediate reaction would be to panic and have anxiety and then now I can watch it that I spiral and I, when I would spiral, I would go so deep that within a half an hour to an hour later, my pain would kick up so severe, that it would cripple me. And now that I can, now that I've seen it and able to acknowledge it, I'm able to maybe head it off the pass or not spiral emotionally, too deep so it doesn’t hurt me in the long run. Emotionally, it does tie into the physical drain later. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: yeah. And you experienced that really strongly, and as we started to find tools to like cut the spiraling, be in communication, work with even just charting your emotions, I mean, 

Kore Curry: ...collages, collaging….

Sarah Marshall, ND: Right? Like literally like, like getting to be able to have an, that's an artistic way, you know, using like images from the internet or magazines to be able to express what you're dealing with and you would like collage your pain, you would collage, you know, the things that you were dealing with emotionally and it was a way to get it out and then to be able to be in communication with your partners and people in your life about what it was like and what I was dealing with.

Because I remember in the beginning there just be so much overwhelmed of pain,  it with like, you know, we call it the amygdala hijack. It's like your brain shuts down because it's so overwhelmed with that experience. Then even if you wanted to be able to share with people, what you're doing is like, there were no words.

Kore Curry: Exactly. And I remember when you first took me on back in June, July, whenever it was. You said, how about I make you better by Christmas? And at that time I laughed because I knew it was a handful of problems. Well, guess what? By Christmas, I was able to enjoy the holidays. It was fantastic. I was in very minimal pain. I was able to control the emotions and be able to communicate with those around me what was going on so I can make the best of the holidays. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: yeah, totally. We started sluicing out all kinds of things. Like, when you realized how important it was to stay warm and not let yourself get cold, like that was like, that was like a big breakthrough moment, when you could correlate one, you correlated the emotions, the spiral and decreasing your pain. Then I also remember there was another big level. If you're like, if I can stay ahead and not let that chill get in, it would make a huge difference with your pain.

Kore Curry: And I've, I've talked to other patients that have fibromyalgia and they agree with the coldness if they keep their body warm, they have less pain. So I have to admit, that is a great way to try to keep on top of it. Layer up people.

Sarah Marshall, ND: you know, and I mean, just looking at like all the things, right? Like, cause there was, there was a lot of different components. So like we did the protocols right? And it's easy to kind of focus on that. But what other things were you changing and altering in your life? 

Kore Curry: Um, communicating with my partners and family members to say what is actually going on so they could help me cope with what. Um, emotionally I was feeling and physically. So if I was dealing with something like finances, they would try to set me aside and go, what can we do? If I hadn't communicated that in the past, I would just let it spiral and build up in me and then next thing I know, I'm in crippling pain. So that's one way I was able to change the pathway. Another way is, you know, the warmth, making sure that I'm staying warm. Um, another way is being aware of what.. Sometimes you just wake up in pain, that's what fibro is. And trying to be like, okay, so what do I need to do today? Do I need to drink water? Do I? What supplements have worked in the past? Like calm, gentle, or gen and trauma gen, and take those and see if I can head it off at the pass before it gets even worse. Stretching. That does work really well. Um. I know it's hard to do when you're in pain, but if you can do a little bit, it does ease up. And those are the main ways that, I, I think I've been able to be aware of it and communicate... Communication with those around you and telling them what's going on with you so they can help you, I think is a big key too. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. We talked a lot about, cause you know, inherently you have a lovely accomplished perfectionist streak. And so discovering your capacity to actually like you were even just sharing with me before is like, yeah, sometimes it's when you're having a bad day, but to be able to even just let the house be messy and not add the stress of that. Right? And also to, to, and I know you struggled with it, but being able to ask for help when it was just like, it's really not going to be me that's gonna be able to do this.

Kore Curry: Exactly. Um. Having others around that can help you does help a lot. And trying to separate the emotion from the physical. That is a big key. So if you can separate your emotions and just accept that pain is pain, it's going to be there and take the emotion out of it, I've noticed, I've hurt less. If I combine the emotion with it, then I realized that the pain, physical pain will increase. So for example, if I get out of work and I've had a really bad day, I've noticed myself sitting in my car and just try to take in what's actually causing the pain. If I can, I'll separate and leave it at work. If I don't, I've noticed that my pain sets in on my way home, and by the time I get out of the car, which is only 20 to 30 minute drive, I'm hobbling around in pain. But if I can separate that and just, well, today was a pretty cruddy day, let's just leave that, I’m not hurting as bad. So, it's hard to do. I'm still struggling with it, but if you can actually separate that emotional tie within and be like, well, today's going to hurt, that's okay, take it easy, don't overdo it and just leave the emotional, uh, component out of it. It's not as lev...leveling. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Can you give any pointers of like how you do that? 

Kore Curry: That's a good one… 

Sarah Marshall, ND: I know, right? It's like, it's like, I mean, I've watched your progression through, you know, there was a point where even identifying what emotions you had, you were just upset. So we actually gave you a list of emotion words and you started charting and noticing like I feel isolated, I feel worthless, I feel powerless, I feel angry, I feel unloved. I feel left out. Like there was a whole bunch of different words on there that you could start to even, what I would say from my side of it was like, pull that apart.

Cause it was all one big ball of fiery pain and emotion all at one time. In the beginning where I got better at like, literally being able to say, here's my feeling, here's my pain. 

Kore Curry: So that did help. Um, for example, if say Ajax or Kitsu, were to, they, they said something that set me off in the past, I would let that either angry me or, you know, make me angry or make me feel sad and shut down, which in turn would make my physical pain worse. Then now what I tried to do is be like, okay, I didn't like how that came out. Try to ask what they meant by it. And see if they could reword it, maybe I misunderstood them, or maybe I'm internalizing something and they meant it as playful and figure out what the heck actual component is. And if, if they  didn't mean it in that way, but it still hurt me, it be like, well, I'm actually hurt by that. Try to let that emotion out right then and there so it doesn't turn in into the physical aspect. Yeah. So try to separate it by figuring out what the emotion is handling it and putting it off to the side, being like, okay, okay, that's handled. Now I can move on.

Sarah Marshall, ND: yeah, totally. You know, and then it is hard to do...

Kore Curry: it's hard to do...

Sarah Marshall, ND: it's hard to do and it's a skill set and you have really supportive partners around you who, you know, come from that place and we'll talk through stuff in that way, in that cause like you've been a really powerful example of how stress in your emotional world. Cause if you think about it, if we stuff in emotion and we clamp down and we try and put it down here, literally our body like clamps down on it, and then, then the spasms, the lightning pain, all of that stuff can go up. That comes with, 

Kore Curry: here's another thing. Um, if you're around someone that you can't actually stop that. That because they just don't get it and that's how they are. Like for example, when I was with my dad the other day, he was in his rampage of yelling at people and upset, and I started feeling the anxiety, but I cannot communicate that he was creating anxiety. He, he would not understand on that level.  So what I did is I was be able to pull myself away from the situation and be like, everything's fine. We're not dying. No one's getting hurt. And I ended up pulling myself into a space that makes me happy. Whether it was playing a game or admiring the ice on the trees, or trying to focus on the current situation and being present, trying to separate myself from what, what's actually happening, of the negative energy that was building in other people.So once I was able to do that, I realized that the anxiety wasn't there and I was just enjoying standing around watching people, people. And 

Sarah Marshall, ND: totally, 

Kore Curry: I just enjoyed my time being like, okay, so I'm out and about and I’m not hurting bad right now. You know? And it just appreciate the present time. So that's communicate...

Sarah Marshall, ND: And it really, that's a really big thing that you just mentioned. It's a big deal. And you know, in any, in any time in our lives when we're getting overwhelmed by emotions, just getting present and there's actually, I had a coach once who when I was spiraling in my own way, actually, literally had me describe the items around me. He's like what’s something that's in front of you that you can see right now. And so it'd be like the tissue box and he'd be like, okay, describe the tissue box to me. And the more I would be out here with the tissue box in present. All my stuff disappeared. And then I go back into my head and I could like wind it back up again and literally like spin myself back up into my fury.

And then he'd be like, okay, pick another object. And I'd like, you know, and it was, it's, it's kind of a trick to actually have that moment of being present and being out here. You know, and I know in people that have been in, you know, longterm hospital stays for severe car accidents or accidents is, that's a word.

Um, accidents and surgeries and things like that. They will, I have mantras in their head, or they'll literally be singing like ancient songs in their head. And that creates a way, now that's in your head, but it's still like pulling you into something that you're being present with distinct from all of that that's going on. So that's, that's a really big deal. That's awesome that you discovered that. 

Kore Curry: Yeah, and I'm still working on that because I am very much influenced by those around me. I've been taught that growing up that was being aware of what the situation is, what the mood is in. So luckily I've been able to lately being able to just pull it aside and be like, okay, get, like you said, get present.

Like at the time that we were at the restaurant with my dad, I'm like, okay, so I'm so glad there's a tree here that I can hide behind, whether it's real fake and I'm trying to figure out whether it was real or fake, not on anything else. Realizing it was real. I was like, Oh, well that's cool, poor thing is getting hit all the time by all these people focused on the darn plant.

Sarah Marshall, ND: That's awesome. So if you're willing to talk about it, what would you say the hardest part about the last nine months has been? Where's it been the most challenging? 

Kore Curry: Accessing my inner child and realizing how much, deeply it's been hurt and how much my childhood probably stemmed everything. Um, the fibromyalgia and my pain and dealing with my mom and trying to separate myself from my mom so I can heal right now until I'm able to communicate what is actually going on.

Um, trying to separate myself from my dad because he has the negative energy. That's been very challenging too, cause I was very close with my dad. Um. And just dealing with this, like a lot has been dug up from my childhood and I didn't realize how much I have stuffed down over the years just to get through.

And each time that I do dig up through it, it will hit me hard and I'll feel very small. But lately I'm discovering that it's okay to feel small. That's how you heal and just allow yourself to heal and be with that, that small side has been a challenge. You wanted to stuff it down. You don't want that pain to come out and to try to deal with that pain and let it come out and console it has been very challenging. Over the holidays it hit me hard. Over my birthday it hit me hard. Holidays was the one time that I was like actually happy in my family and nothing was going wrong. But at the same time it was all toys and gifts, you know, it wasn't, Oh, let's all just get together cause we actually enjoy our company. So a lot has stemmed up and it's, it's been very emotional letting that inner child come out.

And when I discover one of my stuffed animals that I had as a kid. I remember the first time I held it in, I don't know how many years, I just burst into tears, the smells, the feel of it. I was like, I didn't realize how badly I was hurt on the inside and how much I did actually stuffed down. And that was the biggest eyeopener and that was the hardest to handle. But a little stuffed animal would send me that deep.  

Sarah Marshall, ND: And so, you know, I've watched like. W would you be willing to share some of the things you've actually embraced to kind of, you're really good at taking care of your inner child. You just go for it. So what, what does that look like? 

Kore Curry: Um, do you mean like my stuffies and stuff?

Sarah Marshall, ND: Sure, yeah. 

Kore Curry: Um, so they've allowed that inner child to come out by feeling small but playful, small, like wanting to color or just want to hold my stuffed animals. I have several stuffed owls that just make me feel loved and comforted even though they don't say anything. They all have names. They all have personalities. But when they come out to play I forget about the world around me. I have like a comfort.. like, I didn't realize I always have a comfort blanket. That's how I deal with that inner child. Cause it always like just to be warm and soft and fuzzy and owls make me happy. So it's full of vows and I talked little small voice and I like to play with playdough...

Sarah Marshall, ND: which so many of us actually, I actually got coloring books downstairs and like, my favorite thing is hanging out with my friends kids so that it looks normal when I'm like, yeah, totally. Let's keep you out. No, seriously, I want to play Legos. Like you guys playing Legos or playing Legos, you know? But I love how much permission you've given yourself in creating an environment. You know? It's like. That's a big deal. That's a huge part of healing is being willing to go back and nurture those parts of ourselves that didn't experience the nurturing. And no matter what, you know, whoever is listening, like it could even just be that you weren't mothered enough or mothered in the way that you needed.

It's not to go and bastardize and make our parents wrong necessarily. You know, as one of the things you shared, that was really powerful, starting to discover the extent to which that you're mom did what your mom knew to do. She has her own stuff. You know, that's a huge shift when it's not like she was this horrible person, you know, and recognizing her own patterns of pain and demons and all of that and what she was dealing with.

And there was a big missing in your childhood around what the way you said, I mean, you can use your words, but I remember you saying something about like, like B, you weren't able to be little when you were little. You always had to be more grown up. Handle things like that. 

Kore Curry: Yeah. Like the house always had to be clean for friends to come over. And if I wanted to go over friend's house, well, I don't feel like going out today, so I would just be in my own head and go with my imaginary friend at the time. Umm, another.,I have noticed a breakthrough this week actually. Um, when I really wanted to be small cause I had a rough day at work. It was just overwhelming. I had a lot of pain. I came home and said I wanted to be small. So what I did is I asked for hot chocolate, grabbed my stuffies and blanket and colored with my hot chocolate and the next day I felt a lot better. And it's just allowing yourself to take the time back. Step out of adulthood and just do what you love, what makes you happy. For some it's video games. For others it's coloring. Sometimes it's as simple as watching TV on the couch with a blanket. Yep. It was a matter of trying to find out what actually works. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Grilled cheese sandwiches, which sometimes can be inflammatory, but sometimes they're really comforting. I mean, it's like I shouldn't really eat a lot of cheese and wheat, but at the same time, there are times when like that was the thing was grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, and I like, I can measure how well I'm doing or not emotionally, and when I'm really like in the number of grilled cheese sandwiches in a month, I'm like, Oh, okay. It was a six grilled cheese sandwich month. What is going on here? What am I not dealing with? You know? 

Kore Curry: And it was, I think, nice this week. Normally in the past I felt bad asking, Hey, can you make me hot chocolate? cause I physically can do it, there's no problem of me doing it. But to be able to ask and not feel bad and actually have a nice cup of hot chocolate was fantastic and it just, it was, I don't know, it was really rewarding.

Sarah Marshall, ND: It's so awesome though. I mean those, those are the things, and it's like. Yes. The, the supplements are making a huge difference. We're literally rewiring your genetics. We're working on helping your body detoxify. I mean, we did a whole know, pretty serious GI. Microbiome reset. You know, that was like a six week protocol and you had a huge opening when that was done.

So like there are those biochemical components and like one of the reasons I'm doing the healing project is there are some phenomenal people out there. Dr Axe has like this incredible blog and he's got all kinds of information and Chris Kresser has got great information out there. I mean, Tim Ferris has been pioneering this kind of work for a long time, but there's a lot of it that's just focuses on the microbiome, here's the nutritional things you need to do. Here's specifically the diet things you need to do like that, and it's like, I want to expand this conversation to getting on the couch with a cup of hot cocoa that your friend or your partner made for you with a warm, soft blanket and a familiar stuff toy from your childhood is as integral and important as the very sophisticated at alleviation of microbiome and dysbiosis that we have like it’s that's part of the healing process that we don't talk about very much because it's not sexy and it's not sophisticated and you know, like that.

Kore Curry:  Also, you know, with me being called Owl and me having bird like qualities, me being, being able to pretend like I'm an owl or an hour is fantastic release as well. If you, you know, as a child, I used to pretend I was a lion. If I access that, I'm sure it would help release, but I'm more of an owl than a lion.  

Sarah Marshall, ND: But it's so cool because like these are things that we did as kids all the time just to express ourselves to play. But who knows? Like. Letting these energies channel through our body. And you know, I mean, I also have been studying shamonic medicine and in shamonic medicine, bringing in the great tiger spirit energy was a healing event, and we don't have a normal, accepted societal way of dealing with that stuff at this point. Although there are like. I can't remember the name of it.

There's a whole, um, fitness movement of primal movements and they like do all this. Like it's a workout on a gym floor and you're like being the lion and you're being the orangutan and you're being these different animals and they're doing it for physical fitness. But I gotta think there's like a whole world of healing your child getting in touch with play, you know?

And even if it's not, let's see, you have great childhood and there's like not anything there. Tapping into these places of play. You know, this was a big one for me to learn. I was miss  serious. Everything was serious. And as you know, my sister will tell you and it's like, that was a little hard for her. Cause she comes way more from the play side of things, you know? And as we grew up, it was like something from me I was actually physically really little. I was much smaller than kids my own age. And so when I was eight years old, I looked like a six year old and people would interact with me like I was young. And so improving my bigness, I would speak a particular way and I would act a particular way and I would like try and be more grown up to try and like prove myself. That didn't go away when I got older, so like it's  been really healing for me in my life as a whole in my enjoyment is getting access to play, and that's a lot of what we're talking about here. But like play as a therapeutic outlet, you know?

Kore Curry: allow yourself to go to the arcade and play skee-ball I'll tell you what, you'll feel a lot better than you have in a few days.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. So awesome. Good. Um, what else? What else do you want to share about this? 

Kore Curry: So stick to it and don't give up. And if you feel a little bit of relief, there's more to come. Umm, It's not an easy journey. Not by any means. If you can do the legwork, you'll notice a difference and you'll be grateful you did the legwork. I am looking forward to accessing that inner child more and digging up more stuff. I do recommend breaks in between cause otherwise it’s a bit intense, especially in the middle of winter. Just keep taking the supplements. Keep doing the hard work.  

Sarah Marshall, ND: what happens when you mess up? Wink, wink, when you don't take the supplements. Wink, wink. 

Kore Curry: You actually ended up feeling physically and emotionally worse and you start beating yourself up. And you don't allow for that play and inner child to come out to heal. I kind of stopped yourself from healing and you really do need to, although I don't want to be hard on myself. I understand why it hits. And that's another thing is try not to be hard on yourself. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: That was more where I was going with it. And I think it's perfect you answered it the way you did, cause that's one that you still work on, you know, is like. You'll come sometimes and you're like, Oh, I've been so bad. There was this one time at six o'clock on Tuesday that I didn't take my supplements.

I'm like, dude, breathe. It's okay. You know? But yes, I mean, yeah, of course. The more we take the action that is actually contributing to our healing, the better we feel. But you have also been very much on the journey of healing that having to be perfect, having to do it right, having to have everything, you know?

It's actually in my world as the practitioner, a breakthrough when you come to calls and you're not prepared with your handwritten notes of every single thing. I'm like, yeah, she's relaxing. I mean, those are great too, you know? But like being able to start to like have that inner compassion has been a part of it as well. It's awesome. 

Kore Curry: Communicating with those around you is a very big key factor and letting them know what's going on because as for fibromyalgia, they don't know what it's feels like. Only you know what it feels like and you don't know how to describe it. Try it with pic collages, I'm telling ya.  

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah, that was a big one for you that made a big difference.

Kore Curry: When I showed it when I showed it to Kitsu and Ajax for the first time, they went, Oh my God, I had no idea. It really does. Get them to believe the mindset that you're in and get them to see what your pain actually is.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah, because what does fibromyalgia look like on the outside? 

Kore Curry: Completely like, I'm normal and healthy and just moving along and just having a rough day sometimes, or just making it up in my head. That's what it looks like. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Totally right? It doesn't have that obviousness to it, that other things. Now I actually think there's a lot of chronic illnesses that we're dealing with at this point that are like that. And that's part of what we're kind of uncovering and letting go is that like, you know, cause I, I would never say somebody overdramatize it, but sometimes, at least for me, I would think there'd be a tendency to want to kind of make it sound like, like, Oh so bad, just to get people on board to even understand that I'm dealing with something.

But unwittingly, we're then propagating even more intense symptoms. So finding other ways to be able to express that and you know, and you do have a really awesome environment around you, you know, have support system for those kinds of things. Yeah. Awesome. Well, thank you for taking the time to share your story and your journey.

And I have my final question for you is where do you think you are. Like if you could say, like on your progression of this, like, are you close to being done? Like what do you, what do you think that's, how do you, how do you know where you are on the journey?

Kore Curry:Physically? I feel like I'm close to being, you know, back to normal and functional. Emotionally, I still feel like there's a lot to heal and I still want to work on that aspect so I can continue to physically heal as well. So I feel like I'm close physically, emotionally I still feel like there's some leg work to do. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah, and that's a big deal, you know, I mean, I have often been quoted that in the first year of intensive work doing chronic disease reversal, we can alleviate about 80% of the symptoms that somebody is dealing with.

But the 20% that's left over is usually the toughest stuff. That's why it's still there. Emotional or particularly persistent symptoms, you know? Then it kind of shows itself what the root causes are. Some of the deeper taproots and where things really came from start to become even more apparent. You know, when we've got four or five more months, until four more months until we're really at that year mark. But for you to actually say that. This far in, you feel like you're mostly physically almost back to normal. It is a big deal. That's, that alone is huge, you know? And then your willingness, I think, to take it on multifaceted, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And sort of your, we didn't even talk about it today, but you've really taken a look at your career and what job do you need to be in that actually supports you and fulfills your life and recognizing the connection that that has to your wellbeing too. And looking at new options around work, both in terms of what would be good for your physical body work, but also like that would be more fulfilling for you.

So like addressing it in all areas, it does speed up the process in that way, which you've been a shining example, gold star gold star for doing that. Yeah. That's awesome. You're kind of midway in some senses, physically not further than that, emotionally opening stuff up. So to be able to share your story on the court in the middle of it all, not just like, yeah, and then that thing happened and now I'm all back to normal. You know? It's really powerful, so thank you for that. Yeah. Good. All right. Until next time. 

Kore Curry: Alrighty. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Okay. Bye. Bye.

Thanks to today's guest, Kore Curry for sharing her joy, her heart, and her remarkable story. You can learn more about finding your own healing by going to Sarah MarshallND.com or following me on Instagram at Sarah Marshall N.D special thanks to our amazing music composer, Rodney Nikpour and editor Kendra Vicon.

Thank you for being here. Until next time.