I Am American and I Am Black with Tango Towns

On today's episode, we are joined by Tango Towns, who courageously shares what it is for him to be a man and to be an American, as we are challenged to confront what it will take to end racism once and for all.

References from the Show:

Tango’s Bio:

My name is Tango Towns proud Owner and CEO of Aggressive Intelligence , I am a certified Neurotyping Specialist, Performance Enhancement Specialist, and Football Physical Preparation Specialist. I started and lettered at the University of Utah, a Division 1 school, at the highest level of collegiate sports; as well as had a brief professional career. I have worked with everyone from professional athletes to busy moms, dads, and business owners to achieve their physical and mental goals. My mission is to provide everyone who has a desire to develop into their fullest potential, and their best selves with the resources and information they need to have lifelong discipline and self accountability. My system works through intentional resistance training in the gym and through the development of self discipline in nutrition and mental fortitude. I'll be your guide through the journey of a lifetime. Welcome to Aggressive Intelligence. Looking forward to helping you become your best self!  

Full Transcript:

Sarah Marshall, ND: A note to our listeners. This episode is a starting point of a conversation about race, racism, being human, and our current political landscape in the United States. This is a massively emotional and impactful topic, and I respect your views and commitments may not match those expressed here. This episode isn't about being right or wrong or about agreement or disagreement winning or losing, judging, or being judged. What matters is that Tango and I sat down and talked and we had the dialogue. I really recommend you allow yourself to listen and take note of what resonates and what doesn't. What could you do to increase your compassion for those who do not hold your views as their own?

(music)

Welcome to HEAL. On today's episode, we are joined by Tango Towns, who courageously shares what it is for him to be a man and to be an American, as we are challenged to confront what it will take to end racism once and for all. I'm your host, Dr. Sarah Marshall.

(music)

So welcome to HEAL. I've got Tango Towns, my love, my delight, my trainer, the one who kicked my ass in the gym and all the best possible ways. And I like, I legit had breakthroughs in my life, in the gym. And I never saw that coming. Like a good friend of ours, ours mutually said, you got to show up on Saturday morning and do this thing.

And I was like, all right. And then I just totally fell in love and discovered a whole new side of myself through weightlifting. Shocking, but there was so much more than that. So, that's one of your many roles is as a trainer, but you've also become a coach and a person of motivation, inspiration in my life as well.

Okay, anything else I left out? How else would you yourself? 

Tango Towns: I mean, no, man, you, that, that was perfect. I wouldn't know what to say. Thank you for that.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Totally, totally. And  you and I have gotten to know each other as friends and you've shared some of your journey and I've just been so taken by, like what I've seen and then I'm going to let you put it in your words, is that you truly are a man of transformation. Like you've already lived many lives in a relatively short lifetime, and you have so much to contribute to share about that. So I'd love to hear, like, what does healing mean to you and how have you seen it unfold in your life? 

Tango Towns: Well, first and foremost, before we get into that, I want to let  that the feeling is for sure mutual.

I've learned a lot from you as well, in our relationship and in the short time that we've known each other. And I think you are a very amazing person. And so, there's been some things that you've helped me with that have given me some breakthroughs in my life. And so, I just want the world to know that the energy is most definitely reciprocated both ways, and it is most definitely appreciated both ways as well.

Now in regards to the question you asked, you said, what do I believe healing is? And to me, my definition in healing is just being at peace with oneself. What that would mean to me, it's just being,  a man of, or,  for me, at least being a man of God. And what I mean by that is I believe I'm godly. And so I walked this earth the way I believe God would. I'm not very religious. And so,  I don't tell people who they used to look up to a relationship and there's no judgment there. But in regards to healing, my definition of being healed is someone that is being at peace. Someone that is not necessarily content, but they are confident and empowered in knowing who they are and being who they are.

 Sarah Marshall, ND: I love getting to that foundational level because  in my line of work, a lot of the conversation about healing has to do with changing lab values or restoring cellular function. But ultimately that's actually, what I experienced with my clients is that they do the physical work and they discover the peace, the love, the joy, the connectivity.

So you kind of cut to the chase right there. 

Tango Towns: Yeah. See, I mean, I like to tell people all the time, people think,  lifting weights is a physical thing, and you've been able to witness this yourself. For me, it's a lot bigger than physical. It doesn't matter how much weight you can put up. I can care less about how much weight you can put up. It's more so the challenge that you give yourself, because in the moment you have a weight or some weight on your back, or you're underneath some weight and you have to make a decision, whether or not you're going to make, let this weight smash you, are you going to push past this weight. And so I say that to say, for me, When I'm in the gym or when I'm training my clients, I let my clients understand that that weight that they have on them is the barrier that they're afraid to get past. And once they realize that they are more than capable of getting past that barrier, the sky's the limit for them.

And so,  just giving you a head, I mean, I know you didn't really ask, but this is the reason I do why I do what I do. training to me is so much more than training people, it is all about helping the individual become their best self. That's what I'm about. I'm all about helping you become your best self everyday, because I truly believe,  one: change starts with oneself. And so if you want to see change in the world, you've got to make sure you're willing to make that change within yourself. Once you do that, though, the next best thing you can do is then go on to empower people and help people empower themselves by showing them how to become their best selves.

And, the reason I like using the gym is because it's just a little staple rather. I get people to step in the door and once they step in the door, it's not necessarily that they get hooked to the weightlifting in the process, but they realize that soon all of the expectations or all the strategies or all the perspectives that I have them live by in the gym, they actually can take and apply to their lives. And once they realize a lot of the stuff that I have them think about mentally in the gym, when they apply it to their lives, they start to see themselves unfold as their best selves.

And so, I try to help people be their best selves in every moment, because I believe if I am my best self and I give you my best self, then you're going to go out and do the same thing to the world. And that'd be a trickle down effect. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Totally. It was cool to combine your knowledge of like anatomy and the physics of my body. And then what I know with how the body holds traumas and memories, cause like specifically to out myself, I remember the first time you had me put up a lot of weight for a squat and like I hit one of those barriers. Cause like I have had this knee injury and what I actually came up against was like this really old, old, old thing from my childhood of like, if I push too hard, something's gonna go wrong.

Tango Towns: Yes. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: And it, I don't know where or when, and like I can surmise, like growing up with childhood asthma. I remember I kind of got this strategy of like, if I push too hard, I'm going to have an asthma attack. I'm not gonna be able to breathe. So I always would leave 20% in the tank. So I would like never fully go for it. I'd never fully push all the way through. I'm like, I'm under this bar and I don't know, it wasn't that much. It was a lot of weight for me, but it was like, I'm under this. And I like. I'm almost in tears coming up against this barrier and then breathing through it. And then two weeks later I was putting up way more weight than that and moving like a champ, like, and it was such the sense of accomplishment and at one level, yeah, there's the physical side of it, but I know I broke through something emotionally in that moment that like, it's just never going to be the same after that.

It was really amazing.

 Tango Towns: I'm so glad that you actually touched on that because, my favorite thing is being able to watch you all come into your greatness, watch you all realize that, Hey,  I'm actually the one who put limitations on myself, regardless of when that limitation took place , regardless of what trauma it is, you, you went through at some point during that moment where you had that weight on your back and you had to stand up, you had to realize that you were making a choice to limit yourself, and when you realize that, you made the decision, which there's one or two ways you can go, but most people either make the decision to continue to not take accountability for that. Or they make the decision to say, Hey, no,  what am I going to allow this to continue to limit me anymore? And they progress past that, which is why you were able to continue to put up way more weight, way more weight without even even thinking about injuring yourself, because it wasn't going to happen. Another thing too is,  a lot of the problem with our society today is a lot of people like to focus on the things they don't want. And that's one of the things I remember telling you in the gym as well. I was like, man, you cannot focus on what you don't want.

Cause when you put energy into what you don't want, that's usually what you create. When you focus on what you want, that's what you create. Because you're using the limited amount of energy that you have for whatever objective it is. And you're using it for the right resource, as opposed to using it for what you don't want to happen or trying to prevent what you don't want to happen from happening.

And so, it's just cool to watch people come into themselves in those moments and realize that, Hey,  what. I'm limiting myself right now under this bar, because I'm afraid of this weight because of my knee, and because I've never done this. And because of whatever reason it may be. And then once they're like,  what, F---- that. I can do this.

They didn't step out of the gym, and any obstacle that's thrown in their face they're like, what?  (tongue click)  If I can do this to myself in the gym, man I can do this. This is nothing. You understand what I'm saying? And so it's a lot bigger than the physical aspect, for sure. For sure. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: So if we take that and we widen our view, cause I know you also have a pretty good, amazing background and perspective on where we impose limits on ourselves, like who we say we are because of where we're born or the color of our skin or the circumstances.

So would you be willing to share some of like your kind of coming of age stories? Like how you, how did Tango end up becoming the Tango we know now? 

Tango Towns: Well, I mean, Tango is who he is today because of a lot of failure, growth, success,  opportunity. And also a lot of beautiful people along the way, good and bad,  whether they were going to negative or positive side of it, they were beautiful people. I say that because I was able to take and learn from each and every one of the individuals that were involved in this process of the growth of tango, I guess you could say. But it all starts back in South central Los Angeles.

Many people have heard this story cause a lot of people follow me. I'm on Instagram and I've done a couple of other podcasts. And so, if you haven't, I'll keep it as brief but as detailed as I can. I'm from South Central Los Angeles,the Crenshaw district to be exact. I been on my own since I was 14 years old. I was born into, a wonderful family. I was born to a mother. My mother name is Tamika Peterson. She's a wonderful woman. She's, by the way, she has her own fragrance company. So you should check out Rendezvous Fragrance. She has her own line. Anyways, and then my father Gino Towns, they both were involved in gangs in Los Angeles because that was just the culture where I came from. And, with that being said, as I grew up as a kid, I was involved in gangs. And,  I used to say "unfortunately" and I'm not going to say that now because it's not unfortunate. The reason it's not unfortunate is because it's helped me become the man I am today. I don't regret any decision I've ever made in my life.

And  I will say there are moments I'm not the proudest of, but again, I don't regret anything because it's helped me become who I am. I say that to you to say I was born again in South central LA in a pretty rough environment. I grew up in the Crenshaw district and my mom and dad were both young and my mom had me when she was about 15 or 16 years old.

And so, basically me and her grew up together. My dad, he was around 19/20, so me and him grew up together as well. And yeah.  I don't really like to get too much into detail in regards to what they were, who they were, but I'll tell you this, they were the greatest parents for me.

A lot of people may look at them and look at our relationship and think that wasn't the greatest, but it was the greatest, I wouldn't change anything about it because I'm grateful for who they are. They taught me and showed me what I want and helped me become and bloom into this man I am today. Yeah. And so, they also helped me see and learn what I didn't want.

And so I'm grateful for that. Anyways. Been on my own since I was 14 years old, went to Palisades high school. Well, I went to Westchester and then I ended up going to Palisades because I got kicked out of there. And then, I wasn't allowed to check in any other school, but the school they gave me an opportunity to check into, which was Palisades.

Funny thing though. I was an honor student through school all the way through, from elementary, all the way to the end of college. I just, outside of school. I just was one of those kids who, I was just misled, I had to eat and that's how I looked at it, honestly. And so I was willing to do whatever and any and everything I needed to do to eat, whether it was legit work or if it was, maybe work I'm not, wouldn't be so proud of.

And so, I say that to say,  I put myself through college. I made a decision that I was not going to become a victim of my circumstance. And I made a decision that I was going to prove all those people wrong that told me that I wasn't going to be nothin', told me I was going to be dead before I saw a certain age, 'cause I was involved with the gang life and things of that nature. And so,  I made a point to prove not only to the people, but to myself, most importantly, that I was more, I had more value than to die and expire on the streets of South central LA. And so, that has been my goal. And so, any and everything I've ever set out to do, I've been able to accomplish.

I told myself I was going to go to a division one college. I did so by going out of high school, straight to junior college, I went to West LA junior college, shout them out--I'm a Wildcat for life--and then, went from West LA and came out here to Utah before I even knew what a Utah was and fell in love with the climate and the seasons that they have out here and the mountains.

And so I went to school out here, enjoyed my time in school, learned a lot of valuable lessons. That also helped me mature into a man and one of those main, one of the main lessons that I learned was being able to learn how to take accountability for one's self and my actions,  and not pointing the finger at everyone else for my problems.

After that, I had a little brief professional studying, professional sports, professional football, and played indoor ball, had a couple NFL tryouts and that was it. And then, started a couple of businesses, actually, I came back and was a car salesman and a broker, and I realized I didn't want to be that for 50 years.

And so, I up and quit one day. Again, I became a stock broker. I got my chapter seven and decided I didn't want to do that either. So I quit that and ran into my friend, John, who trained me for my pro day and things back in college. And I was training with him at the time. He asked me to go in business with him in AF.

And I said, yeah, I took the opportunity to do so. And did it. And from there. The situation took off here I am today. I have my own brand called Aggressive Intelligence. I'm currently in the process of building. It's going to be an online thing. and so I'm going to create a community of like minded people, like my good friend here, Sarah, and, yeah, that's pretty much the short introduction of who I am.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah, I think, I mean, it's. I really appreciate the way you have chosen to use language around it. Because one of the places where we stop ourselves from continuing to grow is where we keep rehashing traumatic past. And we get locked into that language. And there is a difference between truly healing or transforming your relationship to your past, or like, pretending everything was great when it wasn't. And 

Tango Towns: Living in that trauma.

Sarah Marshall, ND: And I can hear you. Yeah. Like I can hear how you didn't and you could go into great detail about specific things that happened that in,  some of my listeners may never even be able to imagine what life would have been like to live in South central LA and the conditions that you did or under the circumstances you did and the way that you're able to actually create this empowering conversation of being grateful for it and honoring the lessons and like not rehashing that I think is it's critical to now getting to not be defined by our past and create what's next. 

Tango Towns: Yes! I really appreciate you touching on that because one of my big things is one  the body doesn't know how you speak about it, so you gotta be careful and be very, very precise in the words that you choose. Be specific in the words that you choose. And also,  I am. I've come to peace with a lot of,  my past, not a lot, all of my past. I can actually honestly sit here and say that to you. Am I a perfect man? No. I still have my struggles, as we all do, but because I'm aware in our continue to go to war with myself every day, I'm very aware of these things.

And so, because I am very aware of these things, I no longer live in my trauma. My trauma no longer identifies who I am. And so I say that to you to say, I am not a gang member. I'm comfortable with sitting here telling you I'm an ex gang member, had you asked me this maybe a year or two ago, that would have been something hard for me to express to you.  The only reason being is not because I'm still active or still a gang member, just because that is something that is deeply rooted in my culture that it would have been hard for me not to identify as that, but now,  I'm in a place where I'm at today, where I identify as a man. Okay. I'm a man above all else. And I am a man of integrity, honor, and I have moral standards. And so I'm a righteous man. And again, like I told you, I am godly. And because I strongly believe in my faith and believe in myself and what I say to you, I don't live underneath a label.  This is why I am not a trainer. This is why I'm not a football player. This is why I'm not a Black man or African American or Negro or whatever else you think you want to call me.

It's the reason I say this is because I am a man and I understand this. I am a man above all, and I am a godly man, because I walk in the light of God and that's what I believe. And so with that, it brings me to the point of what's currently going on in the world today.  A lot of what's going on in the world today is, just at least from my stand, my point of view is a lot of misunderstanding,  you know what I mean?

I say that because, we as Americans or we as American people don't necessarily know the, the, the, the ins and outs of our nation. We don't know both sides of the story. And I'm gonna just be blatantly honest with you right now, because I know I can be, we know the white side of the story,  know what I mean?

We know white America, but we don't know the slave slide, the black side, quote, unquote, the American side.  My issue with what we're currently dealing with today is. When people see me, they view me as an African American or a Black man or a Negro. I am none of the above. I am a man and I am an American.

Now, is that me telling you that I'm not proud of my culture? No, I'll give you a good example. When I see white people walking down the street, I don't call them European Americans. And most white people in America have some European descent. You understand what I'm saying 

Sarah Marshall, ND: This is one of those like obvious things, but this is where our language shows us so much. Like when we tell stories and like our tendency is to be like my friend, Steve, my friend Tango, we'll say my Black friend Tango. We don't say my white friend, Steve. 

Tango Towns: Right! Exactly!

Sarah Marshall, ND: And the same thing happens in sexuality. And you'll hear, we have to like qualify all of our friends who are gay or bisexual or transsexual.

And it's like, and it really is like, Oh, like as if you would need to know that they go against the normative culture. Well, whatever that means. Now that, I mean, I don't quite have the statistics in front of me, but it's getting pretty close to where the dominant Caucasian is not going to be the dominant race. Like we're, we're, there's more blends that is truly what it is to be American.

Tango Towns: Right!

Sarah Marshall, ND: And then we also like, I'm what I want to say first. And cause this is, so the conversation I want to have with you is like, I'm stating right here and now my own ignorance, because I was born in a predominantly white, suburban area of outside of a city and, there's certain levels of exposure I haven't had. And what I'm really committed to is increasing the diversity in my own life and to just person by person, like not make assumptions about, Oh, you're now representing this whole community of people. Like it's not even about that. It's like you and your perspective, and you have perspectives into culture in life that I have never experienced.

Tango Towns: And I appreciate that you can acknowledge that. One thing that I want to make sure I touch on is I want people to understand the whole point of me making these statements here currently is because the term American is supposed to mean and represent all of the people in America. I don't care if you're gay, straight, transgender, whatever your religion is....I don't care. Okay. That's not, Oh my that's not my business. That's why we live in America because that is your business now.  I'm not very political. I don't really care for much of what's going on in the world today.  My standpoint on that is,  keep your head down and work. Whenever times get confusing, work, because if you work and you stay consistent at work and everything will work itself out . I have opinions on a lot of the things that are currently taking place, but a lot of my pains that I have are based off of factual information that I've been able to educate myself on in regards to books and things like that, that I've read.

And so I'm not just. My opinions and things that I have, don't just come from,  out of the back of my mind. And so I say that to you to say, my problem with America today is there, the one thing that we all fail to realize is there is one race and that is the human race. And I know that sounds so cliche, but it's true.

 If you're a science believer, then you would understand that the only reason that my skin tone is the color that it is, is because my ethnic region and the background that my ancestors come from, the climate they come from is covered in sunlight. And they're beaming and sun. You would understand that if you're European or have some sorts of European descent, you're probably from the polars of the world.

And so what happens in the polars of the world? You don't get very much sunlight there. So what do you think would eventually take place with the skin tone of the beings that are there? Well, the skin tone would naturally naturally be lighter because you don't need any melanin because you don't get that much sunlight, you understand that something that's scientifically shown.

And so. With that statement said, you would then understand that we are not very much different. I mean, I can get a black woman and have her stand next to you and you and her, both who both have breasts and a vagina. We are not as different as we like to, portray man.

I mean, we're not as, we're not as far off or as different as we like to seem. And the unfortunate thing is because the way our nation was founded,  we've all as a whole have been neglected the opportunity to actually truly get to know our neighbors. And what I mean by truly get to know our neighbors, I truly mean to actually get to really benefit from what we each and every one of us can bring to the table where we come from,   in regards to the different parts of the world.  I'm a hundred percent American. I'm not African because I've never been to Africa.

Yes. I have African ethnicity. Yes. I am proud of my skin tone. Yes I am proud of my culture. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: And I have German ethnicity and I have actually just got my DNA analysis done and it came back and I'm like, mostly French, English and German. 

Tango Towns: European descent!

Sarah Marshall, ND: And I have been to France for nine days. I've been to Germany for one day and I've been to London for three days. And that's it.

Tango Towns: But you're a hundred percent American. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: I'm American! 

Tango Towns: Because you were born on this soil. You see what I'm saying? And so that's my point. It shouldn't matter whether you're a woman, it shouldn't rather it matter to me at least. I mean, it shouldn't matter whether you're a woman, it shouldn't matter whether you're a man. It shouldn't matter whether you're gay or not.

 That's your business. However, me personally, in regards to,  human nature and what it means to be a human. What it means to be human is acknowledging that you are a human being before all else, I don't care what title you give yourself. You're a human being and that's just what it is at the end of the day. And so I'm going to respect and treat you as such. That brings me back to what you were saying about the verbiage that I was using. the reason I use the verbiage that I like to use is because. One: I like to be very specific and clear on what it is that I'm trying to, the point that I'm trying to get across,  I don't want there to be any confusion and so I say that to say,  just like the term American represents you a hundred percent, I want that to represent me as well. And that's what my ancestors who were unfortunately brought well, no, I take that. That was as well. It's not unfortunate. The reason I say it's not unfortunate is because, although my ancestors went through some tragic events over history and tragic struggle in regards to slavery, it allowed people like me to exist.

And so I am grateful for them and the, the struggles that they endure. I'm grateful for the people like the Harriet Tubman's because again, Harriet Tubman, didn't say, Hey, I want to be free because I'm black. She didn't say, Hey, I want to be free because I'm a woman. She said, I want to be free. And I deserve to be free because God gave me life and he gave me this land and that's what I deserve.

And so I'm going to take it. You understand what I'm saying? And so, the reason I'm very specific with the verbiage that I use is because it's like, yo,  I mean what I say and I say what I mean, and at the end of the day, I want to be viewed as an American man. Period. I'm a righteous man. I live a righteous life.

I pay my taxes, I ain't a second class citizen, and neither were my ancestors. My ancestors helped build this nation, just like any other man did on this nation. And the coldest thing about this to me is,  I don't understand why this is so hard for people to recognize because. The people who founded this land were leaving oppression.

They were fleeing from oppression. That's why they came to America and founded America. That's why we had the independence from British, or let me say, that's why. The white Americans during the 4th of July had their independence from the British, because that's what they were fighting for.  At the end of the day, my ancestors, as well as everyone else's on this nation has helped create this  wonderful place.

And it will only become great, because it has never been great for everyone, it will only become great though, when we all realize and are aware of the things that have taken place in our history and our past, not so we can point the finger and be like, Oh, you're terrible because you're white because I didn't ask to be black. And neither did you, you didn't ask to be white. That's just what you were blessed with.  We as a people need to be able to look at the past and take from the past so we can then progress forward and move forward as a people, as a oneness, because that's the only way any of this stuff is going to be solved.

I mean, I mean, unless you guys want to continue to be controlled by the corporations, but what do I know? 

Sarah Marshall, ND:  There's like, I, my brain is like, I wanna ask you 10 things at once, but, I'm gonna try and narrow it down. It's like, I'm both dealing with. My innate heart as a human being and as a practicing healer where I, I do know what there is to do. Like, I actually love what you spoke to about getting to know your neighbors.

And this goes way beyond race. This is just pick any judgment or prejudice you have about another person having to do with education, economics, politics, whatever.

Tango Towns: Whatever.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Getting to know the other side and like a very concrete example that was from my life is when I was in a relationship with a man who had an ex-wife and two children and his ex-wife and I were like each other's biggest challenge, as long as we didn't know anything about each other. And it was actually from a coaching program I'd been involved in that I actually got that as long as I didn't know anything about her as a human and as her own story and her own struggles, I could turn her into this like very characterized person in my head.

And I would make stuff up about she's going to be mad about this or this isn't going to happen or whatever. 

Tango Towns: You'd create your villain!

Sarah Marshall, ND: Mostly it wasn't her at all. It was the version of her I had in my head and I knew that the antidote or the medicine actually to that was to sit down and get to know her and get related. And so once it was clear that I was in the picture and we were going to be like actually co-taking care of the kids. And that was a big place where we had a mutual commitment, I asked her if she'd be willing to sit with me for coffee every two weeks, just to get to know each other. So that, that started. And what was crazy is that was where we started, had a couple of these coffees.

We started to find out, of course,  I mean the same man was in love with both of us at one point. So we actually had a lot in common as it turns out and then fast forward several months later. 'Cause this was actually when I was living in Europe and the Netherlands and I'm in an environment of a whole nother culture, another language.

And I was at a baby shower of my soon to be sister-in-law and here's the ex wife of my current fiance. And she sits down next to me to make sure she can translate the whole thing so that I can be included. 

And it was two months of us getting to know each other that then totally shifted the whole situation.

Tango Towns: But see, look, this is the beauty in that it's not even the fact that you guys got the opportunity to get to know each other. It was the fact that both of you were open minded enough to sit down and have a conversation. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. 

Tango Towns: Because nowadays, today, that's the problem. Every you say anything to anyone, their feelings get hurt. Everyone is being attacked.  Everyone wants to be oppressed. Everyone wants to be a victim. No one wants to take accountability and make change for themselves. That's my issue with today. I again, I'm not going to touch on too much political stuff, cause I don't want that to come across that way.

But again, like I said, I mean, just to touch on what you were just talking about, the reason that that is a beautiful thing is because it gave you guys the opportunity to actually see who you were dealing with, as opposed to creating some made up, imaginatory villain in your head that is going to continue to limit you and validate whatever negative assumption you have about the other individual.

And so, that's kind of what Black people deal with in America. Not just Black people, but  minorities in general. My lady is Vietnamese. And they could, they deal with a lot of  stereotypes.  White people, I got a lot of white friends that also deal with these same stereotypes.

I mean, if you listen to the podcasts that I had with John, I explained, I expressed some of those stereotypes that I was a person who had at one point in my life towards white people, because I was ignorant to the fact that, Hey, at the end of the day, regardless of color, this person's skin tone, this is a human being I'm talking about.

And if I was treated as such, I would feel some type of way.  That's usually most of the time when I'm thinking about when I'm, acting on anything. And so,  if people thought about these things a little bit today and they just thought, man,  what, maybe I should just go down and sit and have a conversation with someone.

Like, for example, I would love for the gay and straight community. Gay, straight, transgender. I would love for all of us to get down and get together and sit down and just have conversations, because I think that would go a long way. Same thing with white people and black people, same thing with the people and the government.

I feel like people, if people were smart enough they would exercise their right to demand, to have the opportunity to sit down and talk to Congress because we do have that right as American citizens. And so the reason I say that, because most people have lost sight in this. Most people believe that conversation can't solve anything anymore. It's, it's no more a problem solver. The only way to solve things is by action. But see what people fail to understand is the ultimate action and the ultimate action of progression is open-mindedness being able to see, sit down and say, Hey,  I actually don't know, and perspective is everything.

So let me sit down and hear your point of view. Yeah, let me hear what you have to say, because maybe I'm biased or maybe what I thought was true is not necessarily a hundred percent true. There may be some truth to it because it's my truth, but it's not everyone's truth. And so, for me, just the person that I am, I grew up in an environment that is,  a very beautiful environment if you asked me, because if you can make it out of my environment, you can do anything. But I also believe if you can make it in any environment, you can do anything. I don't care what color skin you are or where you come from or what you got. You could have dropped me off in any part of the world.

And I would have been where I'm at today. Anyone can be that and that all comes down to the way you feel and believe in how you think about yourself and, I've always. I believed in myself because I was one to always be willing to put in the work. That's another thing that most people aren't willing to do, most people aren't willing to be uncomfortable.

And that's what you were willing to express when you decided to have that conversation. And that's what being open-minded is about. It's the same thing with the wife . She was willing to be uncomfortable and have the open conversation.  When you have these conversations, these conversations are not going to be all jolly peaches and cream man, because there's things that need to be talked about that needs to be discussed and yes, they're difficult, but as human beings, we should be able to discuss these things and be able to agree to say, Hey,  that wasn't necessarily something that should have taken place and we can learn from that.

Sarah Marshall, ND: What do you see are some of those conversations to heal what we're dealing with in the conversation about Black Lives Matter and racism, and to actually start to shift, like actually to be in a new reality, what are some of the conversations that need to be had? 

Tango Towns: In regards to the black lives matter movement, I highly recommend any, and everybody involved in that movement just look up the history of. Not necessarily the black lives matter movement, but the history of these types of, what are they called? not corporations, but like groups, I guess you can call them. The only reason I say that is just because knowing my history and knowing what I know about history, a lot of these, a lot of these groups, even though they mean, well, they're not necessarily what you think they are. Does that make sense? And so I think that's a conversation that needs to be had. I also think the conversation that needs to be had is  this whole political thing, this Republican and Democrat thing is a bunch of BS. The only reason I say that, is just because I thought we were all Americans.

And so I say that to say, like, that's a conversation that needs to really be had too, what are these, what are these things? What are these political backings for? What do they really stand for? Do they really stand for the people or do they stand for the corporation? But one of the main conversations I think we need to have as an American people is one: our laws and what our structures of the law, what the structures of our laws are, the history of why these laws exist and the history of our nation, why we are in the state that we currently are today. Because I think if people from both sides of the spectrum were able to sit down and actually do that and look at the facts and not necessarily look at the feeling and how it makes you feel.

If we were able to sit down and look at the facts and go over these facts, we can actually progress a lot further along in our nation. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: This is my opinion, but I, I watch a lot of people use a political veil as a veil. It prevents the real conversation because there's a lack of accountability there because 

Tango Towns: EXACTLY! Yes! 

Sarah Marshall, ND: actually stand behind,  and I'm not even saying like. I mean, I'm grateful that we have a legal system. We have an executive branch of our government, like I'm grateful for the actual, like you said, the literal working of it. But when we're having these conversations, I think sometimes we try and protect ourselves behind a political view versus actually just owning it and saying, this is my view, or these are my thoughts. And then being willing to open up to the other side and hear about other people's perspectives. 

Tango Towns: Right. I think,  me personally, if you have moral standards and integrity, you will then understand as a human being, we don't need politics. Does that mean telling you we don't need government? No. We most definitely need government and law. Government and law is something we need, but what people need to understand is what the actual job of our government and our law infrastructure is. It is not here to,  control us.

That's not what our law's here to do. We're actually here to control the law. That's why they give us the rights that we have.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah.

Tango Towns: We, as a people don't understand that. And so,  I just think we, as a people need to look into our laws, really study our history and really, really, truly like dive in and be willing to understand and have these conversations because, the only way that infrastructure will ever get better or progress forward is if they really become for the people as opposed to the corporation and the benefit of the capital of the corporation. Does that make sense?  America's one big corporation. That's what people don't understand. That's stated in our constitution. That's also stated in our laws, people don't know that,  I could tell you the exact section and go look up if you like, and  that would give you a lot of  closure because these things really are in our law. And one thing, the reason I keep mentioning this is because our law is not based on feeling. Our law is based on fact and what is written in fact. And so a lot of the reason black people are treated the way we are currently treated in America today is because in law, at one point we were not considered humans.

We were considered three fifths a human being. Meaning we were property. That's the reason why these people. And when I say these people, I just mean all the people that do wrong. I don't mean white people in general. I don't mean anything of that sort. So let me make sure I make that clear because  people like to try to assume or make assumptions.

And so, when I say these people, I mean, wicked people in general, let me just put it to you that way. The reason I say that they continue to get away with these things is because in the law, at some point it stated that we were viewed as property. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: And even when one of the things we noticed is even when laws change. There's a world of literally conversation. There's a world of communication around something where you can have a law altered on the books, but then if no proclamation, if no action, if no continued conversation to shift the cultural dynamic around it happens, then there becomes unlawful actions that are allowed to continue. 

Tango Towns: Check this out.

I was going to say  in our law, it also states that, what is the term? Where say, for example, if there is a law, but people in the, in the community live a certain way, right? Like, say for example, if every Wednesday you're supposed to take your trash out,  but they don't live by that law every day. They live by the old way and the old standard of living and they continue to live that old way of standard of living they're protected to do so in our constitution. And so I say that to you to say again,  this is why America can get away with a lot of the things that it does to it's citizens. When I say it citizens, I'm not just talking about black people, I'm talking about everyone. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: I never wanted to talk about politics or legal things. Like I kind of avoided it like the plague. And interestingly enough, when COVID hit and there was just so much of my life was being impacted by decisions being made at the government level, I, I stopped having that conversation that I wouldn't talk about it. Like I oh-, that was one of the places I opened myself up and both my parents are actually very politically minded and there were many conversations around the dinner table, which is probably why I hated it. Cause as a kid, I was like, not again.

And  (Tango: I don't want to hear it, yeah)  like, I didn't want to go there, but. I've opened myself up and I've been reading more and I've been more interested, I've been educating myself  (Tango: That's what we need!)  in a new way. And, and it's been one of the places where I've grown into a place that it's not my natural desire to learn about, but I do know that every time I dig into it,  I recently actually watched an incredible documentary, called crib camp and it just got released on Netflix. And it's about the people who stood for the American disabilities act to pass. And what I had no idea until I saw that documentary is that it wasn't until 1990, not that many years ago, but 1990, that it was law that you had to make a drop curb so that somebody in a wheelchair could actually go from the street to the sidewalk that you had to actually allow wheelchair access into all buildings for,  even like government buildings to employee options like that you actually  (Tango: Now...) couldn't discriminate against people that was only in 1990 that, that change. 

Tango Towns: I want you to also think about what you just touched on too. That took place in the 1990s. That was true equality that was created for people who have disabilities. You want to know why? Because they weren't forced to live up to our standard of living. In regards to... 

Sarah Marshall, ND: We brought ourselves to make it work for them. 

Tango Towns: Right. We have made accommodations for them so they could live and have equal opportunity to experience things that we do. And so I say that. I just touch on that to say, it's not hard for people to understand that. Why is it so hard for people to understand what we, and when I say we, we, as American people, have had to deal with the reason I don't want to use the term as black people or African people is because I want you and the viewers out there to understand that we are supposed to be brothers. You're American and I am too. So why don't the laws that I have to, why don't the laws that you live by? Why didn't they, why don't they abide to me? Yeah, why don't I have right to free trial?  Why do I have to get, Why do the police, it could be the execution or in the, in the, in the judge,  And I know a lot of people are gonna say, Oh, that's so cliche.

Well, Hey,  it is what it is. Learn your history though. A lot of people don't know the true history of the police. And when the police come from a lot of people also don't know that when America was first founded, America had court marshals and bounty hunters. They didn't need police officers.

Police officers came about after and during slavery. But, and so, and the reason they came about was to keep black people and excuse my French... niggas in check. That's what they came. That's what they were there for. And so, I'm just gonna, the reason I'm putting that out there is because anybody that decides to listen to this, I want you to be challenged enough to feel like, Hey, I don't, if you don't like what I'm saying, that's awesome.  (Sarah: Go check it out) Look it up. Yes! Exactly!

Sarah Marshall, ND: Go check it out! And that is one of the things that I so appreciate about what is happening right now is that there is like that challenge of going out and talking to your neighbors, part of what that forces us to deal with are the places that we're uncomfortable and to confront. And like, again, in one of the,  I do a lot of leadership development courses and I was in one that's literally once a year, people from all over the world, get together in California to take on a conversation called the transformation of the globe.

Like, how do we transform? And have a world that works for everyone? And we all got  (inaudible)  and we're the ones who were like, we're doing it, we're out there, we're doing the thing. And one of the coaches challenged us to go have conversations with the people we think we can't talk to.  (Tango: Right!) Anybody who's in that circle that are the ones that you don't think there's no way I could talk to that person or I would never have anything in common with them, or even if you don't have anything in common with them, go talk to them anyways. And like, you watch a room of 700 people who are committed, that the world works for everyone. And I'm here as long as it's in my comfort zone and they all got pushed. And we got the message.

Tango Towns: Right! As long as it benefits for me, mmm...

Sarah Marshall, ND: but it was like, and  (Tango: But see, it's bigger!) that's what I do love about this is it's stirring things up and like, even asking you to be on this, this podcast, I had my own stuff come up of like, am I going to say something stupid? Am I going to say something ignorant? Like, where am I going to come up against my own ignorances of like, I didn't even know. And then something falls out of my, and that was part of me taking the risk to even  (Tango: being aware though) enter into this conversation and say, it's worth having  (Tango: YES!) , it's worth doing.  (Tango: Yes!) And anything that I totally mess up, I will learn from and I can clean it up and I can be better for it. And so like, 

Tango Towns: and that's why we are friends though. That's also why we're friends, because I want you to feel comfortable enough to know that, Hey, if you mess up, I'm going to let ya. And if I mess up, I would expect for you to say, Hey, look, this is how you can be better because that's how friends and that's how we as neighbors become better. That's how you make America great. You help one another grow. I told somebody not too long ago, they asked me, they said, man, if there was a Klansman standing in front of you callin' you all kinds of names,  how would you respond? And I said, if this was maybe eight or nine years ago, I'd probably run over there and beat the dog living crap out of him. But I said today here right now, I'm not that same, man. If I was to see a Klansman cross street dress in a row, I'd probably be inclined to walk over there and be like, Hey, yo, I just got a couple of questions for you, man.

Like I just want to have a conversation. And I want to be, have a legit conversation. Cause I want to have a conversation of understanding. Cause I want to understand what it is you hate about me so much. And why you hate. Is it because of ignorance or is it because of just straight bigotry? Because you choose. Because some people are ignorant and what I mean by that is some people just don't know.  (Sarah: Yeah) 

They're brought up a certain way and they just don't know. Then you have people that are very aware who make these choices and it's like, Hey,  what? Well, if that's something you choose, at least I know where you stand. I can respect you enough to respect that. Regardless if we have the same viewpoints or not, I can respect you enough to know that you hate me.

That's cool. Stay where you at. Leave it at that. You understand what I'm saying? And so I say that to say, like, when you have these types of conversations it not only gives you. An opportunity to get perspective, but it also gives you and the other individual, the opportunity to choose how you guys want to live your best life.

Sarah Marshall, ND: And to truly come from choice. I love that you use that word because  (Tango: Right!)  I do think there's a lot of defaults in like this actually brings up a whole bigger conversation, which it's, it's in my personal belief and also my spiritual belief that we as human beings are going through another major evolution right now, like just like we did through the Renaissance and other periods of time that there's something at the fabric  (Tango: for sure) of what it means to be a human being is altering.

And we're up  (Tango: for sure) against a particular conversation, which is survivalism and us-versus-them. As long as there's an us and a them inside our own species, 

Tango Towns: we're not going to be anything. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: We're not going to figure it out. And we're pushing up against all those places and they're crumbling and there's friction and violence coming out where they're crumbling. But we, like as soon as you start to recognize, because. I actually know people that have been a part of white supremacy groups and their upbringing. They came from not, not this isn't everybody. This is a particular example, but they came into. 12 years old, they came from an abusive household, they were literally just looking for a place to belong. They found a group  (Tango: and that's) and those were the beliefs of that group. And at one level they found the brotherhood they were looking for, even though they weren't really sure about all the beliefs that came with it. And they would just be an action regardless. 

Tango Towns: It's justified though at that point.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Out of that desire to belong somewhere and out of that desire to feel like we matter.

Tango Towns: And that's the same thing with gangs.  (Sarah: Yeah!) That's the same thing with gangs. That's the same thing with drug addicts. That's the same thing with these cultures. Now, the only thing that I won't say that I'm comfortable with at all, is this pedophile crap that they coming out with talking about people being fluid and crap.

Like I'm not with that at all. Not even a little bit.  (Sarah: yeah)  And if I see anything of the sort t place anywhere near me or in my vicinity, you know, what's going down. Cause that's not cool. But in regards to,  what you're touching on, like... 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Well, when you reach a level of being an adult and actually having choice, there is a point where once educated, you do get to choose how you want to live. The recognition is, is that many adults have just been also trapped inside their own cultures and to bring it back to my world, there are these same groups inside of,  Sororities.  (Tango: Yes!) And there were groups of people who would go join into the Greek system, and then there would be hazing rituals, and there would be us-versus-them.

And there would be sexual harassment and there would be rape. And there would be violence that were committed against groups simply because of a cultural standard. I mean, there is actually no single group of human beings that's immune to this conversation. 

Tango Towns: Exactly. Again, say that one more time. Say it, say that one more time.

Sarah Marshall, ND: There is no single group of human beings, immune to the conversation  (Tango: Exactly!) where we have had violence against each other, judgments against each other, where there's been victimization and where we've gone along with things that may be even our heart knew wasn't right or didn't resonate in order to feel like we could belong and be inside of this safety.

And that whole thing is cracking apart and we will, I hope super double, triple fingers, cross discover where we are actually all one, we are the human race, and then it's just a matter of taking care of each other. 

Tango Towns: I tell you where it starts for us, for us as a human race. It starts with the fact that understanding that we are not God.

Yes, we are godly. But we are not God, we as men, that's why we have the societies that we live in because we believe we have the power to create. We've created these societies because we think we are God,  the room. When we talk about government, when the government says something, we look at them government's word as the all saying word, not God, but the government. And so the reason I'm bringing these points up is because once we, as human beings realize that we are godly, however, being that we are godly, we understand that everything on this earth is given to us by our founding father, which is wherever you believe that may be.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Right. 

Tango Towns: At the end of the day, once we realize that we are human beings and humans make mistakes, humans are going to pass judgment, humans do make assumptions, humans do have feeling, humans are biased. When we understand that these are things that are a part of our human nature, we didn't can understand that, hey, it's okay that we have these thoughts. It's okay to think that, Oh shit, this guy walking down the street may try to rob me because of whatever past experience that you may have had, not because this guy is black, but maybe you've been through this trauma. Maybe that's a trauma you've been through.

It's okay to feel that way. But when you realize that you're feeling that way and you're aware of yourself after you realize that you're feeling this way and you see that, wait a minute. This is a normal human being. And maybe I was wrong about the perception that I had. Then that's when you're able to say, okay,  what, I'm a human, you're a human, I'm sorry for even having that thought process about you.

That's where we can grow.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah.

Tango Towns: That's how we'll be able to grow. We have to acknowledge the fact that man is not all saying of all. Okay. That's the main thing. But secondly, after we acknowledged that fact we didn't have to acknowledge that because we are men, we do have these thoughts and it is okay to feel these things because we are human beings.

However, what is not okay to do, it is not okay to allow our emotions, our feelings, and the things that we think about control the way we perceive and act in this world that we live in today, because we're not the only ones that live here. You understand what I'm saying? I can't walk around mad at the world because I was given whatever shit card that I was given and blame that on everybody. For one that doesn't do me any justice. Okay. But two that doesn't make this world better.  (Sarah: no)  And the last time I checked,  the only, the reason this generation is here is because the last generation was able to make the world that they had prior,  good enough for us to come. It may not have been great or all this other shit, but it was better than what they had.

Our real, only job here is to make this place a better place for the next people that are coming up under us. So why the hell is this so hard for us to understand what it means to get along? Just cause we get along, don't mean we have to agree on everything.

Just cause we get along doesn't mean we have to be sheep. Don't mean we have to have the same cultures. Don't mean we have to have the same viewpoints. However, what it does mean is we need to, we need to stop acting like we can't acknowledge that these things exist. We can't, we need to stop acting like we can't acknowledge that  this religion and that religion are the only two religions.  (Sarah: Yep) 

 You know what I mean? Like these aren't the only cultures, these aren't the only people. White people aren't always right. Black people isn't always right.  A supremacy in general yeah is not the route. And that's any supremacy. Justice and righteousness all the way around is what it should be about. When we, as a people understand what that means and not what it means for just me, but what it means for people.  (Sarah: Yep) Then after you get from that level, you can go onto the smaller scale and worry about what it means for you specifically, because that's the right that you have to,  in America.

But before you can get to that level, we need to take care of this one up here first, if that makes sense. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: And that's a possible way of doing it. And there's, there's another inverse or maybe saying the same thing in a different way that I've experienced where when people are actually willing to heal the wounds and traumas in themselves, when they're actually willing to be authentic about their own pain  (Tango: changing themselves) then there is that willingness to be there and see it with others.

And so, yeah, you graciously skipped over a giant statement about half an hour ago where you said you believe in yourself. And for some people based on,  we can get into the neuroscience of what happens during childhood trauma, but that doesn't end up being how their brain wires, you could take a whole nother person or the exact same circumstances that you did, and the way that they would turn out is they don't believe in themselves. But there are actual places that you can get access to how to heal your own heart and how to heal your own challenges with yourself. And what I've seen is that through compassionate work, Brene Brown's one of my favorite authors that does a lot of work and she literally studied at a sociologic level, like why does one person turn out loving and believing in themselves and another person doesn't. She thought it would be, Oh, well, the people with really great upbringings love and believe in themselves and the people with challenging upbringings don't, and found out that's not the case at all, that challenging circumstances can be just as likely to have somebody turn out loving and believing in themselves, but that there were core fundamental things about forgiveness. There's core fundamental things about being able to see compassion and pain in someone else that made the biggest difference for how they end up relating to other people.

And that work, that inner work, which some people find through religion and the relationship to God and spirituality. Some people find it inside of counseling. Some people find it 

Tango Towns: in the gym.  (Sarah: in the books they read) Some people find it in books.

Sarah Marshall, ND: There's so many places,  (Tango: yep!) but when we cultivate being willing, like that thing of recognizing that these. I don't know the best word for, I'm gonna use my word, which is these inauthenticities happen.

Like it's not authentic to me to be mean because who I really am  (Tango: nope)  is a person of love. And  (Tango, we are not) I've done mean things  (Tango: Yes!)  I have. Then I actually get to be responsible for that. And my willingness to literally look bad in somebody else's eyes and admit my fault, admit my wrongdoing. That's actually the moments when those relationships I've gotten, the greatest bonding, is in that willingness to communicate. I don't have my shit together. I did screw this up. 

And 

Tango Towns: let me tell you. 

Sarah Marshall, ND: So, it's funny 

Tango Towns: because you're hitting everything right on the nose. So what I live by, man, I try to handle everything with grace and I hold myself accountable for everything that I do. Any, and everybody out there that's listening to us today, if you're having any struggles with that, I challenge you to handle every, any and every situation with grace, handle it with grace. And, and, and hold yourself accountable and just watch how in that moment, that changes your not only perspective, but your life tenfold. The only reason I can say that is because I'm a product of that.

When I decided to stop looking at everything, like why the hell is this happening to me? And I started looking at everything like, what can I learn from this? Man, my life became so much easier. And my challenges haven't changed. It's just my perspective on the challenges have.

I don't look at everything as if, I don't take everything so personal.  I look at it is, Hey,  this is something that needs to happen so I can learn. And by me handling these situations with grace. By me being able to understand that there was a decision or some point at some point in time that I made to allow me to get here. It's allowed me to not only broaden my horizon, but it's allowed me to, to help those like you.  It's allowed me to help a lot of my clients who are my friends. These are not people that I just collect money for. These are from, these are people that I actually genuinely care for, and I know they feel the same about me.

 At the end of the day, America could use a little bit of grace and accountability. And if, if she just looked in the mirror a little bit, This would be one damn good place. Cause I mean, don't get me wrong. In the shambles that we in now, America is a pretty damn good place.

Cause I sure in hell, wouldn't rather be nowhere else in the world. Not with the laws and regulations they got everywhere else. Even on our, on a lowest level, whatever you want to call it, it's still a pretty damn good nation. Imagine if we all decided to hold ourselves accountable as one. Shit.  I highly doubt for damn sure that anybody would be able to mess with us because they can't mess with us now. And I think that's one of the things that we, as a people don't realize. Imagine if the Republicans, the Democrats, the blacks, the whites, the Asians, and Mexicans, whatever other nationality, the gays.

Well, I don't use, I honestly don't like saying the gay straight, transgender and all that. You want to know why? Because. They are not gay, straight, or transgender to me. They're human beings to me. So I don't really like,  

Sarah Marshall, ND: I'm not asking anybody else about what their sex life is. Like. I don't know why I would ask  (Tango: Yeah!!) them about it, right? I mean that's a whole different subject.  (Tango: You hear me, you hear me, you hear me.) 

Tango Towns: That's a whole nother conversation. You understand what I'm saying!  (Sarah: Totally!) See this is why. This is, but see, this is why we, we click because you get it. Like, to me, you're just a human, I don't care what you do in your bedroom. If you're a good person, you're a good person. There's good people that are black. There's good people that are white. There's good people  that are, any other ethnicity or any other sexuality. Just as well as there's shitty people that are black. There's shitty people that are white, and there's shitty people in any and every other ethnicity or gender or sexuality you want to talk about 

Sarah Marshall, ND: And because of our relationship. I'm going to toss this out as a challenge for you. And also as a gift to the people listening. I don't believe there's any such thing as shitty people.

Tango Towns: I respect that. I'll say this...

Sarah Marshall, ND: If you actually look and then you can say it. My experience is anyone who does violence has had violence done against them. And anyone who acts with force has had force acted against them. And some of this comes from my experience of, of working with so many people through coaching programs where on the outside, you see aggression and on the outside you see a hardened shell and on the outside, you see certain acts that they've done. But then when you actually get to know that human being and you find out where they've come from from, and what they've been through,  (Tango: it's deeper) it's as much a symptom of something deeper than it is really like...

And that's been a position I've been able to stand in that I don't actually believe that there's evil people. I do think there are acts of ill will, and there are acts that have huge impacts on a lot of people that are not advancing humanity forward, but when you actually take it down to a personal level, it's not the person themselves.

That's my I'm going to put that out there.

Tango Towns: I can acknowledge that. I can acknowledge that. But what I will say is, if you understand and know how the university is created, there's balance in everything you need balance there's matter. And anti-matter. That's there there's negative and positive neurons. That's the reason why our universe exists.

The reason that black holes exist is because there's a positive and a negative charge.  The reason that you have the blood in your veins because there's positive and negative sales, blasé, blasé.  I believe that there is a balance. There's good and bad. There is good and evil, but I do believe that in the end, good, always wins.

And that is me saying that, I do believe that within every bit of evil, there is some good within them. However, it takes a lot for it to prevail because they either don't believe that they are worthy or they believe that that is the way. And so I say that to say, I believe that God uses everyone as an example, whether you're a good person, you call yourself a good person, or whether you're an evil person and we know you commit murder.

 I, I believe God uses people for these examples for a reason. Because I know people that most people would never talk to, or may not even want to be involved with that you would think are some criminals, but if you just sat down and talked to him, You understand why they are who they are and what happened and what transpired for them to be where they're at.

There is good and evil in the world. You have a choice to decide on what side you want to be on though. That's what I do believe. I believe, you make that choice. And once you make that choice after you're aware, then that determines whether or not you're a good or a bad person.

I don't think, I don't think there's shitty people because that is a strong term, but I will say this, I do think there is a balance. And so being that I know that there is a balance, there are people in opposition to peace. Does that make sense? 

Sarah Marshall, ND: Yeah. And that is a whole another chapter for a whole nother podcast.

Tango Towns: Conversation. Yes.  (Laughter) Yes

Sarah Marshall, ND: But I love it. We covered some serious ground here today. Tango towns. I appreciate you so much. Thank you for being one of my partners out there, making a difference in people's health and wellbeing, in addition to them breaking through their mental constraints.

And I just appreciate your time today in sharing this in a really pertinent and relevant conversation. 

Tango Towns: I appreciate you for giving me the opportunity and just picking my brain and giving me some input on your standpoint and how you feel on these things too. It's always good to hear other's perspective and so very much so, thank you for that and to all the viewers or the listeners or,  whomever.

I would love to tell you, well, first and foremost, love to thank you all for listening, but, My main message to you all today is go out and be great. No matter what it is, no matter who you are, no matter what you desire in this life, it is most definitely obtainable. If you can believe it is, yeah.

And don't let anything stop you, but most the change you want to see in this world, you go out there and be that. Because that is the only way we, as a people can progress. All right. Much love to you all. No matter what color, creed or race, if you want to follow me or you weren't tap in with me, my business is Aggressive Intelligence.

Sorry about the background noise. Those are my dogs playin around. But my business is Aggressive Intelligence and my Instagram is @tango_towns. And so is my facebook.

We'll have that all in the show notes. We'll have links for everybody. You can check it out on the show notes and make sure  (Tango: Awesome) we stay connected, keep the conversation open. Yeah. 

And make sure you guys tap in with Sarah, because she's doing some really amazing things with people and their lives. And I really, really enjoy what she's doing for our world. Thank you for being who you are. You're awesome.

Sarah Marshall, ND: Thank you. All right. Go take care of your family and we'll see you next time.

Tango Towns: See you next time. Have a great day.

(music)

Sarah Marshall, ND: Thank you to today's guest Tango Towns for taking a stand for what he believes in and sharing it with us. For a full transcript and all the resources for today's show visit SarahMarshallND.com/podcast. You can learn more about finding your own healing by going to SarahMarshallND.com or following me on Instagram at @SarahMarshallND. Thanks to our music composer, Roddy Nikpour, and our editor, Kendra Vicken. We will see you next time.

Previous
Previous

What Men Need to Heal, Thrive, and Be Powerful with Performance Coach Ed Kennedy

Next
Next

Transformational Birth and How to Heal Birth Trauma with Dr. Jen Schwartz, PhD